zero per gallon

It’s ironic, really. That when you drive, you line the pockets of the only country in the world that doesn’t permit women to drive. Or bike. Or take a bus. Or be out by themselves.

Meet Manal al-Sharif. She’s now facing the prospects of a public flogging because of the stand she took on her right to drive a car. She might be up against the same punishment if she’d shot a video of herself biking, or taking a bus, or even walking the streets on her own. That’s because Saudi Arabia is one of the most backward-minded countries in the world when it comes to women. In fact, it’s the only country in the world with policies this stringent. But the United States is crippled when it comes to taking the moral high ground because of our addiction to oil.

For the past two years, Saudi Arabia has been our biggest overseas importer of oil, surpassed only by our neighbors, Canada and Mexico. And Mexico’s lead is only edging Saudi Arabia out by a thread.

So while we gulp down oil and Senators try to cut funding for more energy efficient transportation options, we churn cash into the economy of a nation with a history of oppression. I’m sure Ms. al-Sharif wants her country to prosper, but the fact of the matter is that our nation’s addiction to oil has long kept us from taking a stand on issues in the Middle East, particularly in Saudia Arabia, one of our staunchest allies in the region. I think after the revolutions against propped-up regimes across the Middle East and Northern Africa, the blinders are off about America’s true stance on “freedom and justice for all.” You just can’t trust an addict.

To sign the petition to drop charges in this case, go here. And you know where we stand on freedom from [foreign] oil (it’s scrawled across the top of our website).

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Zero Per Gallon is embarking on a journey of scientific discovery. The mysteries of burrito fuel are about to be unlocked, and the powerful truth revealed.

The bike lifestyle apparel brand will be partnering with the prestigious* Secondary Academy for Success, one of the preeminent secondary education establishments of Bothell, Washington, to determine the legitimacy of the 53 Miles Per Burrito claim, once and for all. The Secondary Academy for Success, a 9-12th grade secondary institution known for its focus on Academia and Success, has been written up in such publications as The Bothell Reporter, The Zero Per Gallon Blog, and Bothell.pi.

“The idea for this project was born the moment I saw the t-shirt,” says Chief Researcher and Professor of Awesome at SAS Mike Wierusz. “I lost countless nights of sleep wondering if the statement was really true.  Can you really get 53 miles per burrito?”

The project is not without its risks. Kit Kohler, President and Big Kahuna of Zero Per Gallon, at first felt hesitant to allow the company to be involved in a project that could shake the very foundations of its most popular product, the 53 Miles Per Burrito T-Shirt. “I was both thrilled and terrified by the prospect of validating or invalidating Johnny5′s burrito fuel efficiency estimate,” says Mr. Kohler. “It figuratively took my breath away.” Wierusz had his own concerns about how the study could backfire. “My concern with this research is that it comes at the tail end of deep conversations and debates on greenhouse gases (methane, etc.).  With all this burrito consumption, will we be doing more harm than good?” In the end, it was decided that the truth needed to get out.

Stratagems for accomplishing their lofty research goal were immediately discussed, including “an exhaustive search of taquerias in the greater Seattle area,” with an eye towards burrito volume and density, ingredient variations, and “the effectiveness of burrito additives such as Guacamole.” In the end, corporate interests won out as Burrito Behemoth Chipotle took a considerable financial interest** in the project.

A web page has been set up to document the study. Research began today.

Zero Per Gallon and its Big Kahuna regard education as paramount to the future of our nation and any humor or sarcasm found within this article is intended to be directed only at Zero Per Gallon and its subsidiaries, not at the brilliant educational prowess of Mister Wierusz, MAT, LEED AP, or the fine, upstanding and well-behaved students of The Secondary Academy for Success.
* All judgements are based strictly on biased conjecture.
** An as yet to be determined number of burritos, estimated somewhere between 10 and 18.

Limited edition Holiday 2010 53 Miles Per Burrito Tees

I like the holidays, what can I say. Twinkling lights, gifts, parasitic plants that offer an excuse to make out with someone at random. So this year, I’m not stopping with the free shipping. No way. Instead, I’m excited to introduce you to the new, limited edition holiday tee collection.

First off are the special, holiday-ish Navy and Cranberry colors–the perfect attire for your company’s black tie event (just tie an inner tube around your neck). Printed up just for the holidays, not only are these shirts a in new colors, they also were printed using a special water-based, dye removing formula. Consider it our holiday gift to mother nature (and our t-shirt printer. Plus, it results in an awesome, slightly off-white color underneath. There are close-up shots on each that really show you how cool these are. Cranberry and Navy tees are available in sizes S – XL.

And if drop bars and downtube shifters aren’t hip enough for you, our special edition fixed gear tee is hella what you need. Designed for Trickster Treat, a Halloween Alleycat in San Francisco, it features ZPG and I <3 TL (Tenderloin) spoke cards, a red toe strap, and glow in the dark aerospokes. Hot damn, that’s a fly ride. A portion of the proceeds from the fixie shirts will go to Up On Top, an after school program for disadvantaged kids in San Francisco. Sized only in M – L.

So there you have it. Order away before they’re all gone, and don’t forget to take advantage of the free shipping on orders over $30.

To encourage you to share the righteousness with all the bikey people in your life, domestic shipping on orders of $30 or more is FREE until December 10 15. There are plenty of ways to hit that mark. Here are a few badical suggestions:

• 2 cozy T-shirts
• 25 bitchin’ stickers plus 2 righteous patches!
• 1 radical T-shirt plus 10 stickers (or 2 patches)
• 50 kick-ass stickers!!$!
• 6 hot-to-trot patches!!!

Stay tuned for more holiday announcements coming up, including some holiday-only colors of our most popular tee. I can’t wait to get them in my (very sanitary and not at all grubby or little) hands.

San Francisco, the city in which I work, recently announced possible plans for a congestion toll to combat high traffic volume downtown during peak periods. The response from my otherwise progressive colleagues was not at all positive.

Let’s face it, people already spend a lot on their cars, especially in urban areas. 2008 estimates put the average annual operating cost of a car to be $4,100, and in urban areas one can only assume it’s much higher with tolls and parking. Parking in my building is over $150 a month for a space you share, end to end, with another car. Single spots are significantly more. So it’s understandable that the idea of more cost related to automobiles is an upsetting prospect. But let’s look at the facts.

As Streetsblog recently highlighted, automobile transportation is not just expensive for car owners, it’s just as expensive for government. Yet when was the last time you heard a real outcry when it came to repaving a road or building a new highway interchange? Sure, there are always the NIMBYs, but their complaints are usually unrelated to the tax implications and more about the fact that their house is going to have to be torn down to accommodate the new superhighway.

The sad fact is, many self-defined progressives are all for bike and mass transit infrastructure until it steps on the toes they’ve so delicately placed on the gas pedal of their hybrid. And who could blame them? The subsidies are invisible to the average road user, they show up on an annual tax bill instead of a bill with “vehicle congestion toll,” written on it. Charging them for using their car feels like a personal attack.

But what do I say? I’m prepared for this argument, but the outrage has already reached a fevered pitch. Nobody wants to hear the voice of dissent at a moment like this, especially from the bike guy.

As a cyclist in my office, I am constantly aware of the potential for my own marginalization. Colleagues may like to cheer me on in principle, but nobody wants to hear me preach when they’re at the pointed end of what I’m getting at. The second I start pushing my agenda, I’m fear my status as an outlier in my workplace will quickly turn from crusader to radical. And once you’re there, it’s much more difficult to get people to listen to what you’ve got to say.

So I sit on my hands; I bide my time. I write a blog entry. I wait for a better moment to tell my colleagues, some of whom live in areas less well served by public transportation, that charging automobile drivers really isn’t such a bad idea when you consider all the space they take up and damage they cause to our city.

I’m just not sure whether a convenient time is ever going to show up.

This weekend is the 2010 San Francisco Bicycle Expo, and if you’re anywhere in Northern California I highly recommend a trip to check this out. From a cyclocross race and pump track to big and small vendors to a bicycle fashion show, this event has it all if you’re a cycling fan in the Bay Area.

Collabo 53 Miles Per Burrito Fixie Shirt by theloinsf

I will be hocking my wares in a shared space with my friends at Ideum Apparel. Not only will I be selling all the awesome products available on the web store, but I’ll be selling the extremely limited edition collabo tee designed by my friends at The Loin SF. Not only do you get a sweet shirt, but I’m donating a portion of the proceeds from its sale to this year’s Trickster Treat charity, Up on Top, an after school program for disadvantaged kids in San Francisco.

So come by and say “Hi.”

Jasmine Herron/Valentina, an artist and cyclist who was killed in NYC this weekend when a driver opened a car door into her, throwing her into the path of an oncoming bus.

Over the weekend, Jasmine Herron, an artist and regular city cyclist was killed when she was knocked into the path of an oncoming bus by a careless driver’s opening car door. Reading about the tragedy in BikeBlogNYC made me rethink my principle of not sharing stories about cycling accidents. Should I send this to those who follow me on Facebook and Twitter? Should I link to it from my blog?

Less than two weeks ago, I was waiting on my bike at an intersection when a pedestrian stepped out in front of a fast-moving truck. As a cyclist, you learn to be on guard for everything going on around you–you just can’t take anything for granted. As the cross walk signal turned, I saw a truck coming, not slowing. The pedestrian saw the light turn, stepped forward, and looked down, lost in thought. For about a second I watched him, thinking he would look up and see the oncoming truck. Nothing. He marched forward, lost in his own thoughts.

I don’t remember thinking, I just remember doing. I called to him. Watch out. WATCH. OUT. He froze, a few seconds before the truck gassed it through the long-past-red light and passed him with what looked like inches to spare. The pedestrian, an older man in work clothes, stepped back onto the curb, turned, and stared at me in disbelief. He didn’t say anything.

“That truck just blew through that light like it was nothing.” I said to him out of a need to say something. He continued to stare.

“Thank you.” He said, emphatically, weighing the words in hopes that I would understand what he didn’t, couldn’t say for fear of fully realizing his own mortality… for saving my life.

Out of necessity, cyclists train themselves to be hyper aware of what’s going on around them. I can feel a car coming up beside or behind me. Cyclists and pedestrians are more exposed, more at risk, more underprivileged on the roads. But we’re also more in tune, more aware, more adept at recognizing our surroundings. We wheeze in the exhaust, but we also smell the flowers–without even having to stop. We break and we bleed, but we live and breathe in a way you just can’t inside a car. In my opinion, it’s only a sacrifice when others don’t respect our space or our lives.

I don’t retweet accident-related obituaries, even when they touch me, because I’m unwilling to give anyone an excuse not to get on their bike. I’m simply unwilling to link to a story that could lead someone to hang up their bike in the garage and grab the keys to their car instead.

Life is fragile. Fate is fickle. Ride like your life depended on it, smell, sense, feel your surroundings, never stop relishing the moment you’re in right now. Cancer might get you. A heart attack might get you. Yeah, a car might get you. But a life lived in fear is no life at all.

So get out on your bike and ride for Jasmine. I think it’s what she would have wanted.

It’s been about 8 months since I’ve taken over Zero Per Gallon, and I’m contemplating adding some products to those we sell on the store. Most would be branded, but I’m also considering adding products that fit into the overall mission of ZPG and complement our brand.

Any time and thought you can put in to answering these three polls would be extremely appreciated. Your feedback can help make ZPG what you want it to be!

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I’m a messy eater. And burritos aren’t the cleanest food on the planet, especially if the taqueria’s engineering team didn’t do their homework when picking materials and designing the wrap to contain the rising PSI as I place my chompers around its supple flesh and bite. So when I get down to grubbing, I frequently spill. And when it happens, it’s possible I’ve ruined a perfectly good pair of pants. This is, of course, par for the course when you live off burrito fuel.

But rather than dwell on federal regulations that could’ve made deep sea oil mining safer, or about how terrible BP is while filling up a thirsty tank at another oil company with an equally appalling environmental record, we need to be honest with ourselves. We have a place in this. We demanded cheap gas. We demanded our government make automobile travel more affordable–at least on the surface. We were unwilling to make sacrifices to our behaviors or to our pocketbooks to affect the change that needs to be made for a clean energy future. And for whatt? So our gas prices can remain artificially low as our taxes bankroll one of the most environmentally damaging and inefficient forms of transportation on the planet?

For an instant, America is awake to its problem. We may have a hard time realizing it all comes down to each of us as individuals, but dammit, at least right now we’re all forced to look at the grim truth. As happens with every addict, we’ve hit something close to rock bottom. So now is the time. We’ve got to sit this country down on the couch and tell her we love her but that she’s got to get help.

MoveOn is floating a petition out there to Congress and the White House asking them to accelerate the push to end our addiction to oil. I encourage you sign it. Out here in SF, there are a few events happening to grab the attention of oil-addicted drivers. But beyond the minute-long investment of throwing your name on a digital petition or whooping it up with a bunch of hippie San Franciscans, I ask you to get even more vocal in your support of the things that can get us to put down the crack pump. Let’s tell America how to get help. Even if she doesn’t want to listen.