Buy a patch!


Patches with the ZPG motto are just like the original stickers, except that they're totally different. They're made of fabric! And they cost more! (Cause they're rarer and better.)

ZPG patches are made of beefy nylon, with merrowed (stitched) edges, so they won't fray, or drip, or leak, or otherwise vex you. And they're embroidered (rather than screen-printed), which, in the patch-world, means they're high-class. They're like the king of the patch jungle. They've also got iron-on backs, so that you can put 'em almost anywhere except your forehead.

*NEW* Patches are now available in two sizes: normal and bumongous.

Normal patches measure 2" x 6" (5cm x 15cm).

Bumongous patches measure 6" x 18" (15cm x 45cm).

Q: That's a HUGE patch!

A: Why thank you...

Buying stuff is easy!

You can buy patches with Paypal (or a credit card).

Normal ZPG patches cost $5, and bumongous ZPG patches cost $20. All proceeds go directly to Jonny5's Circumnavigation Fund. (Every little bit counts!)

Shipping anywhere in the USA via USPS is 42 cents for normal patches, and $1 for bumongous patches; I'll gladly ship patches to faraway lands like Zanzibar, too. If it costs a ton, I'll email you a PayPal invoice.

All proceeds go directly to Jonny5's Circumnavigation Fund.

1 normal ZPG patch = $5.00

1 bumongous ZPG patch = $20.00

If you work at a really friggin' awesome bike shop and want a ton of patches, email me and we can arrange a bulk discount. I love getting cold, hard cash in the mail, and I'm willing to trade patches for (sacrificial) goats.

His Royal Excellence the Honorable Plenipotentiary Head Honcho Chief Executive Big Banana of ZPG, Mr. Jonny5, can be reached at:


Come on, quit grumblin'. It goes to a good cause. Get 'em while they're hot!