Posts Tagged ‘society’

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Buy Hormone Over The Counter, A fella in Bakersfield emailed me this note two days ago:

"Love the fact that you're promoting cycling, and the $0.00 per gallon concept is brilliant. Kudos to you, 40mg Hormone, and hope you make some serious money off of it. However, hate the fact that you use profanity on your website - that's really uncalled for, 200mg Hormone. Why not get rid of it. 750mg Hormone, Nothing wrong with making cycling family friendly, plus I suspect you're clever enough to come up with witty things to say without using it."

Here's what I wrote back:

Thanks for shouting out, and for digging the ZPG idea, Hormone japan. I dig it too, though I can assure you, making serious money on the idea is not part my plan, buy Hormone Over The Counter.

Having lots of fun, 20mg Hormone, though, is... and that's sort of the reason for much of the profanity, Hormone uk. But let me make my case better: I'm a trained writer. Hormone canada, I studied it in college, got a master's degree in journalism, and have written for many big publications, 150mg Hormone. Buy Hormone Over The Counter, And then, just like that, I burned out on it -- at least on parts of it. Everything started to seem so dull and formulaic, 30mg Hormone, and much of it became soporific to me. Now, I don't wanna type everything in UPPER CASE, 50mg Hormone, or use a million !!!. Hormone coupon, exclamation points, and become some sort of ranting lunatic [like so many in the blogosphere], but I do wanna make my writing more real, 250mg Hormone, more honest, Hormone craiglist, more human. And since I'm an adult (and since most of my readers are adults), I use the words shit, Hormone mexico, fuck, Hormone overseas, ass, and whatever else I can come up with.

Bear with me: I don't think there are any "bad" words, buy Hormone Over The Counter. I think it's possible to write (or say) extremely derogatory/vulgar things, 100mg Hormone, but I don't think the problem is the array or curse words out there. 1000mg Hormone, Sure, the words help. But it's the sentences, 500mg Hormone, and the intent behind them, 10mg Hormone, that hurt. Now go back and look what I've written. Buy Hormone Over The Counter, Most of it's a parody of something I'm fed up with. It's opinionated -- and maybe even rude -- but not belittling, Hormone australia, or insulting. Hormone paypal, In fact, I don't even think it's inappropriate for kids. Language has power only because we give it power, Hormone ebay. Someday, Hormone usa, we'll have used up the power of the words fuck and shit, and we'll come up with some replacement... and then another., buy Hormone Over The Counter. and then another..., Hormone india. endlessly reinventing some "naughty" word. Hormone us, So, the way I see it, getting rid of particularly words isn't the way to go. Cycling is (and always will be) family-friendly -- and if my website forces some parent out there to have a discussion about language and appropriateness, I'm all the happier for it. And in the meantime, I hope it keeps most everyone else out there laughing, and maybe even thinking about what the fuck we're saying.


Thoughts/comments anyone.

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No RX Norvasc

No RX Norvasc, Four years ago, back in grad school in Boston, I spent a lot of time reading and drinking coffee at Espresso Royale, over on Commonwealth Ave. I read a lot of nonfiction: stuff by Joe Mitchell, Philip Gourevitch, John McPhee, Eric Schlosser -- that kind of stuff -- as well as every back issue of The New Yorker I could get my hands on. Espresso Royale is a pretty big coffee shop, 250mg Norvasc, and it was easy to bury my head and get lost in books for hours there; dozens of other students were busy doing the same thing. One afternoon I came across a piece of fiction by George Saunders -- it was "Pastoralia" -- and it made me laugh so hard I couldn't keep reading. Actually (I remember this distinctly), it made me laugh so loud that the people around me couldn't keep reading.

That turned me on to George Saunders, No RX Norvasc. Since then, I've read all 5 of his books. *(I've also adopted a word he coined, Norvasc coupon, goatless, as Zero Per Gallon's corporate theme.) They're all hilarious; his imagination and perspective are wry and slick and out-of-control-in-a-fantastic-way and somehow dead-on. (Acclaimed writers have compared him to Vonnegut and Twain, and said amazing things about him too, far more articulately than I can.)

Here's one such funny thing, Norvasc canada, called "Ask the optimist"

[googlevideo="" flashvars=""]

Anyway, I read Saunders' latest book, The Braindead Megaphone, on the beach in Mexico last month, and really dug the writerly essays within. There are essay on: a book, full of sharp sentences, Norvasc craiglist, that he read in 3rd grade and which changed his life; how his mind boggled when he first read Vonnegut, at age 23; some techniques to sustaining narrative action in storytelling (Saunders teaches creative writing at Syracuse); and a great review/interpretation/essay on Huck Finn. No RX Norvasc, If you are a student of English or writing or fiction, these essays make the book worth it.

There are also a few "travel pieces" that are unlike any other "travel pieces." They're kind of like traditional journalism on crack, and I mean that in a good way. Saunders "reports" on Mexican immigration and the Minutemen patrolling the Texas/Mexico border; the commercial absurdity of Dubai; a 15-year-old boy in Nepal who supposedly spent 7 months meditating without food or water; and a curious land called Britain. 30mg Norvasc, If you are an armchair tourist/traveller (or if you enjoy reading Dave Barry), and, like me, you have grown somewhat weary of formulaic travel pieces, these essays will rekindle your imagination and leave you giggling in awe.

BUT, there is one essay above all of the rest -- the very first essay, Norvasc mexico, the eponymous essay -- that stuck with me the most. It's 19 pages long, and laser-friggin-sharp, No RX Norvasc. it's about us/our-brains/the-media/how-we-communicate/propaganda/commerce/writing/politics/democracy and a bunch of, uh, smaller, tangential themes. 10mg Norvasc, It is intensely relevant. I wish I could discuss it, in person, over a cup of coffee, with every one of my friends.

The video version sums it up decently. No RX Norvasc, The compressed written version goes like this:

So you're at this great party, hangin' out with smart, articulate, experienced people, and in walks a guy with a megaphone. He's so loud that most guests can't avoid hearing him and in some way or another responding to him, Norvasc ebay, becoming "reactors-to-the-guy." If megaphone guy starts using dumb phrases like "at the end of the day," everyone else starts using such dumb phrases too. As Saunders puts it, "his rhetoric becomes the central rhetoric because of its unavoidability." In other words: megaphone guy ruins the party.

The sad/scary part: "responses are predicated not on his intelligence, 1000mg Norvasc, his unique experience in the world, his powers of contemplation, or his ability with language, but on the volume and omnipotence of his narrating voice."

But it's worse that just that. Megaphone guy is not only dumb, inarticulate, and inexperienced; he's also struggling to entertain people, 40mg Norvasc, so he yells, and jumps from topic to topic, "favoring the conceptual-general ('We're eating more cheese cubes -- and loving it!'), the anxiety- or controversy-provoking ('Wine running out due to shadowy conspiracy?'), the gossipy ('Quickie rumored in south bathroom!'), Norvasc overseas, and the trivial ('Which quadrant of the party room do YOU prefer?')."

The result: the megaphone guy puts an intelligence-ceiling on the party. Hence a more accurate nickname for him: braindead megaphone guy, No RX Norvasc.

From there, Saunders backs up, and asks: What's the best way to accurately transmit information.

"The best case scenario....information arrives in the form of prose written and revised over a long period of time, in the interest of finding truth, by a disinterested person with real-world experience in the subject area, 100mg Norvasc. The report can be as long, dense, nuanced, and complex as is necessary to portray the complexity of the situation."

"The worst case scenario might be: information arrives in the form of prose written by a person with little or no firsthand experience in the subject area, who hasn't had much time to revise what he's written, 150mg Norvasc, working within narrow time constraints, in the service of an agenda that may be subtly or overtly distorting his ability to tell the truth."

But wait, there's more. "Could we make this worst-case scenario even worse. No RX Norvasc, Sure. Let it be understood that the Informant's main job is to entertain and that, if he fails in this, he's gone, 20mg Norvasc. Also, the man being informed. Make him too busy, ill-prepared, and distracted to properly assess what the informant's shouting at him.... Norvasc japan, Welcome to America..."

Saunders suggests that the decline accelerated sharply back in the O.J. Simpson era, and continued through the Monica Lewinsky scandal, No RX Norvasc. He traces the development (or evolution) of a "new style of presentation" and a "new rhetorical strategy" that bolstered obviously-unimportant "stories."

His take on coverage of the Lewinsky scandal: "More at five about The Stain. Have you ever caused a Stain. Which color do you think would most effectively hide a Stain. See what our experts predicted you would say!"

As he puts it, "if someone has to lecture ten hours a day on a piece of dog crap in a bowl, adjustments will need to be made, Norvasc usa. No RX Norvasc, To say the ridiculous things that will need to be said to sustain the illusion that the dog-crap story is serious news ('dog-crap expert Jesse Toville provides his assessment of the probable size of the dog and its psychological state at time-of-crappage'), distortions of voice, face, and format will be required." Often, such "information" comes in banal language, all revved-up: ("cold WEATHer leads SOME motorISTS to drive less, CARrie!")

So it all seems kinda harmless, until something like 9/11 comes along, and "our national discourse had been so degraded -- our national language so dumbed-down," that while deciding to invade another country, we let Megaphone Guy, with his "crude, hyperbolic tools" ("countdown to slapdown in the desert!" and "twilight for the evil one: america comes calling!"), lead the way.

As a result, instead of morality, or debate, or curiosity, or any sort of intellectual/ethical examination, Norvasc paypal, we got "news" bits on tactics and strategy, because that was quick and easy to digest, and more-than-moderately entertaining.

"Why aggressive, anxiety-provoking, maudlin, polarizing discourse should prove more profitable than its opposite is a mystery.., Norvasc australia. In any event, the people who used to ask, 'Is it news?' now seem to be asking, 'Will it stimulate?'" Saunders allows that profit and economic incentives are fine, but adds, Norvasc us, "if these trump every other consideration, we will be rendered perma-children, having denied ourselves use of our higher faculties. (He also explores how it is that many well-educated, bright reporters get stuck producing such content.)

And that's the larger cost of dopey communication, Saunders says. It degrades "our ability to make bold, meaningful sentences, or laugh at stupid, ill-considered ones." It makes "us dumber and more accepting of slop." It's an oversimplification, Saunders admits, but "is some of our media very stupid, No RX Norvasc. Hoo boy, 50mg Norvasc. Does stupid, near omnipresent media make us more tolerant toward stupidity in general. It would be surprising if it didn't."

"Next time we hear someone saying something like, 'We are pursuing this strategy because other strategies, when we had considered them, Norvasc india, we concluded that, in terms of overall effectiveness, they were not sound strategies, which is why we enacted the one we are now embarked upon, which our enemies would like to see us fail, due to they hate freedom,' we will wait to see if the anchorperson cracks up, Norvasc uk, or chokes back a sob of disgust, and if he or she does not, we'll feel a bit insane, and therefore less confident, and therefore more passive."

Or, 200mg Norvasc, take this example, from Saunders' essay on Huck Finn: "In a culture that is becoming ever more story-stupid, in which a representative of the Coca-Cola company can, with a straight face, pronounce, as he donates a collection of archival Coca-Cola commercials to the Library of Congress, that "Coca-Cola has become an integral part of people's lives by helping to tell these stories, 750mg Norvasc," it is perhaps not surprising that people have trouble teaching and receiving a novel as complex and flawed as Huck Finn, but it is even more urgent that we learn to look passionately and technically at stories, if only to protect ourselves from the false and manipulative ones being circulated among us."

Is there an antidote. There is, Saunders says. 500mg Norvasc, "Every well-thought-out rebuttal to dogma, every scrap of intelligent logic, every absurdist reduction of some bullying stance is the antidote. Every request for clarification of the vague, every poke at smug banality, every pen stroke in a document under revision is the antidote." The battle will be won "with small drops of specificity and aplomb and correct logic, delivered titrationally, by many of us all at once."

"Turn that megaphone down, and insist that what's said through it be as precise, intelligent, and humane as possible.".

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Buy Valtrex No Prescription, This wry cartoon, from last week's New Yorker, reminds me of all sorts of obfuscatory/vague/ambigous phrases we use:

-toilet paper (actually, it's ass paper)-throw something away (away. where, Valtrex us. 750mg Valtrex, you mean it doesn't just disappear?)-family planning (you mean pregnancy suppression?)

it also reminds me of corporate jargon, detailed very well in:

- The Dictionary of Corporate Bullshit (check out the video)

- Corporate Hack

-ZPG's vision statement

For some strange reason, 100mg Valtrex, Valtrex mexico, it also makes me think of the container theory.. let me explain, 10mg Valtrex. 50mg Valtrex, The world can be divided into containers and things that can be contained.
coffee: thing that can be containedcar: container that moves, 200mg Valtrex, 500mg Valtrex, stays warm and dry, plays musicfridge: container that stays coldbook: container for words/ideas/knowledge/storiesbookshelf: container for bookshouse: container for many layers of containers: bookshelves, 250mg Valtrex, 150mg Valtrex, fridge, car (in the garage), Valtrex paypal, Valtrex craiglist, etc.

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Astute ZPG observers may have already noticed a recent addition to the ZPG agenda Discount Flexeril, : a problem of epic proportions that is plaguing society, setting a bad example for our kids, and corroding the fabric of this great homeland. 750mg Flexeril, But what, you might be asking, 50mg Flexeril, Flexeril usa, could possibly be more devastating than goats (and the evil they embody). I'll tell you what: plants, 100mg Flexeril. Flexeril australia, They're having too much sex.

That's right, 30mg Flexeril, Flexeril japan, I said it. Plants are behaving like downright sluts, Discount Flexeril. Whores, Flexeril coupon. 1000mg Flexeril, From the very second they're able to reproduce, they do so indiscriminately, Flexeril craiglist, 250mg Flexeril, all the time, with whatever plants they can get it on with, 20mg Flexeril. Flexeril us, Those plants are having so much sex that you can't even walk down the street anymore without getting pollen -- plant seed -- all over you. It's spiraled out of control, 150mg Flexeril. 10mg Flexeril, ZPG is determined to put a stop to this atrocious, immoral behavior, Flexeril india. Flexeril uk, We're still working on some practical solutions over here (ranging from tree condoms to federally-funded tree abstinence programs to just chopping them all down), and we'll get back to you when we have some national policy solutions worth bringing to congress, Flexeril overseas. Flexeril ebay, In the meantime, I urge you to let your local trees know how you feel, 40mg Flexeril. Flexeril canada, If you see a young tree gettin' it on with some other young tree, give it a little kick in the trunk, Flexeril paypal, Flexeril mexico, maybe rustle its branches, and tell it, 500mg Flexeril, 200mg Flexeril, "hey, what the hell do you think you're doing, you punk tree!?"

Pretty soon, if we all pitch in and do this together, we'll get the plant kingdom -- and American society -- back on the right track.

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Where Can I Buy Careprost, On a very serious note, my good friend Andrew was terribly injured last week (on April 2nd). He was mowed over and crushed by a runaway pickup truck (he was working out near Granby, CO, inspecting a condo development) and sustained major injuries, 20mg Careprost, including a collapsed lung, a bruised lung, a broken femur, a dislocated knee, a broken rib, 40mg Careprost, a broken collar bone, and 3 crushed vertebrae. As his wife, Careprost canada, Erin, put it, the vehicle "rolled a 6 ft 4 inch guy into a 2 ft square ball." Erin was there when it happened, thank god; otherwise, there was nobody else around, Careprost ebay.

It took half an hour for 30 guys from the local fire department to arrive, and 10 more to lift the truck off of him, so Andrew spent 40 minutes trapped, 750mg Careprost, all contorted and injured, under the truck. Luckily (and I use the word delicately, since so much of what happened was so extremely UNlucky), Andrew had turned around just as the truck rolled over him, Careprost india. Luckily (again...), Andrew ended up between, and not under, the tires, Where Can I Buy Careprost. Luckily (again...), they got Andrew out on a backboard...

During those 40 minutes, 100mg Careprost, Andrew was screaming and pleading, telling Erin who to call and yelling at his howling dogs and getting angry at the pace of his rescue. During those 40 minutes, Erin had no idea if she was watching her husband die. One of Andrew's femoral arteries could easily have been cut, Careprost overseas, and, at any rate, one of the of the rescue people told Erin, Careprost craiglist, on the scene, that Andrew might not survive and that he would never walk again. Where Can I Buy Careprost, Amazingly, Andrew never went into shock. (This perplexed his doctors, later.) After a short ambulance ride, and, Careprost us, I believe, a longer helicopter ride, he landed in an intensive care unit in Denver. Careprost australia, Andrew is one of the strongest, kindest, sweetest, best-spirited, most determined guys I know, 150mg Careprost, and I am convinced this trauma would have killed anyone else.

So before going on, here's a little video snippet of Andrew, Careprost coupon, dancing in the Utah desert last October. That's Erin, in the red jacket, saddling up next to him. (The clip is from Slotfest.)


Before going into one surgery last wednesday, Erin tried to get Andrew to relax, since patients who feel strong and confident tend to do better, Where Can I Buy Careprost. So she described to him what it was like climbing Mont Blanc (they met while climbing the Arete Cosmique, Careprost usa, on the Aiguille du Midi), waking up before dawn, putting on crampons, Careprost uk, kicking steps in the snow, listening to the crunch of step, step, step, breathing slowly, Careprost mexico,etc... and as Erin described the scene, Andrew's pulse (which was high) began to go down, 500mg Careprost, and down, and down. The same has happened as Erin has played her harp for him. That same day, Andrew was able to scribble a note to Erin, 10mg Careprost, which said "I love you."

That was a week ago, and it was about as much as i could handle. Where Can I Buy Careprost, Now, a week later, Andrew is battling pneumonia, thanks to the oxygen tube shoved down his throat, and a constant 102 degree fever. He has 5 back specialists, 200mg Careprost, 1 leg specialist, 1 lung specialist, many trauma doctors, more anestesiologists, a general manager, 250mg Careprost, and multiple nurses assigned to him per shift. He needs back surgery -- fusing 7 vertebrae, and dealing with his 3 crushed vertebrae -- but the docs keep delaying the procedure on account of other complications, 30mg Careprost, like a tracheotomy (since intubation damages vocal chords after about 10 days). So his 8-hour back surgery is now scheduled for Tuesday, April 17th. Erin reports that the nurses consider him the sickest patient in the sickest part of a hospital that attracts the most severe trauma patients in Colorado. (Update 4/19: Andrew's back surgery went well, and he's eager as hell to get the F out of the hospital already.)

I can't believe this happened to such a good friend, and that another good friend has had to cope with the whole thing for the last 9 days, Where Can I Buy Careprost. There have been many tears, Careprost paypal, and a definite inability to focus. Erin's life must be 100000x more difficult, dealing with so much shock, 1000mg Careprost, as well as legal and financial concerns (another friend calls the hospital "Andrew's $20,000/night suite"), though she certainly has handled it amazingly so far. Apparently, when handed a form asking, Careprost japan, "When did the problem start?” Erin wrote, “When the F-250 mowed my husband down.” Asked, “Does the patient have any special needs?” Erin wrote, 50mg Careprost, “English breakfast tea with 2% milk.” Her humor is commendable.

If all goes well, Andrew will face 3 months in a back brace, and a year of rehabilitation, which is very hard to imagine for a non couch-potato like Andrew. As Erin knows well, and wrote, "It will be very difficult for him mentally to understand how one can be super organized, fastidious, careful, make all the right choices and still have no control over a situation and its outcome." Talk about UNlucky.

So send your love to Erin and, especially, to Andrew. (Write me for their contact info.) Cookies, music, reading material, you name it, as long as it's not a little toy pickup truck, would all be greatly appreciated..

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Buy Vpxl No Prescription, so this dude has been posting the same thing on washington dc's bikes-for-sale forum for the last 6 months...and craigslisters (me included) regularly mark his listings as spam. why. cause it's unfair for him to clog the primo advertisting space on top of the list, and because after 6 months it's clear that nobody wants his stuff, 500mg Vpxl. his rebuttal: he reposts his bike like a dozen times a day. the counter-rebuttal: more people hate him. the result: a craigslist war, Buy Vpxl No Prescription. Vpxl coupon, witness the beauty of this post:

Oh specialized Coaster Man, why can't you take a hint. - $50

Date: 2006-04-11, 4:45PM EDT

Oh specialized Coaster Man, 50mg Vpxl, why can't you take a hint.

I offer these emails from the last month (exhibits A, Vpxl australia, B, C, D, E, Vpxl uk, F, and G) asevidence of the irritation you cause. Vpxl usa, I also offer, as a special bonus, myfavorite "ad" you've ever posted. Buy Vpxl No Prescription, Keep it up, since you make us laugh.


Exhibit A: (2/27/06)

Buy my piece of crap SPECIALIZED coaster bike, Vpxl mexico. - $60

I list it over & over hoping that the craigslist community will finally pay methe money just for the sake of making me go away. Although I should probablyjust give the bike away for free, Vpxl india, my time is obviously worth NOTHING and Icontinually post the bike -- often upwards of 12 times in a single day. Sure, Ichange the name from "Specialized" to "Coaster" to "bike shop quality" to "punkstyle," but it's still the same piece of junk, Vpxl overseas. I wish everyone could be like me, Buy Vpxl No Prescription.
Just think -- Craigslist would have the same 9 million listings every day, thesame crap nobody wants all year long. Vpxl canada, Get a grip.


Exhibit B: (2/28/06)

Everyone realizes that this guy is the Nishiki guy, the Free Spirit guy, etc, 150mg Vpxl,right. Nothing better than trying to scam people into paying unreasonableamounts for a POS. Buy Vpxl No Prescription, He's been doing this shit for a year. Vpxl ebay, I'm proud that all of you are standingfirm and flagging his ass.

He's also got the Schwinn "BMX" "Gladiator" scooter, whatever the hell thosemutually exclusive terms mean. I hear it's tres cool in Kali, 200mg Vpxl.

* this is in or around La La Land


Exhibit C: (2/28/06)

Please, oh please go away you guys. Your bikes, are really not worth much, Buy Vpxl No Prescription. Vpxl paypal, Giventhat, if you continue posting your bikes, at least try to come up with somethingdifferent everyweek.

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Exhibit D: (3/1/06)

WANTED: Specialized "HOTROCK" 20" coaster brake bike - $1 (forever)

PARTS. Vpxl japan, THANKS



Exhibit E: (3/1/06)

WTB: Specialized "HOTROCK" 20" coaster brake bike - $999

Gosh, I have been looking for a Specialized "HOTROCK" 20" Coaster Brake Bike forthe past 6 months. Does anyone have one for sale, Buy Vpxl No Prescription. I would pay anything you askfor it, that's how much I want to own this totally awesome bicycle MACHINE, 1000mg Vpxl.
Hotrock. Anyway, 20mg Vpxl, the coaster brake is great because I like not stopping. Also,this bikes small 20" size is ideal, because it enables me to fit the entireframe in my butt, 40mg Vpxl. Buy Vpxl No Prescription, So please, let me know if you have one for sale.



Exhibit F: (3/7/06)

re:10 speed bike - made in USA - $30 - $1

Is this the same guy who was trying to sell the Specialized "hotrock" coasterbike. Vpxl us, (The modus operandi is the same.) What is your time worth. Why re-postthis thing over & over. Time to check out CL's "Free" page, Buy Vpxl No Prescription. Lots of stuff likethis on that page.


Exhibit G: (3/7/06)

re: 10 speed bike - made in USA - WOWWWEEE!, 750mg Vpxl. - $30

Hey everyone. Buy my crummy bikes from me. Buy Vpxl No Prescription, If you don't I will continue to postthem every day, 1,000 times a day, until you all chip in to pay me off. 30mg Vpxl, These bikes are the finest in quality. Complete with rusty chains & cables. Butto make you feel better about throwing away money on something I should haveposted on Craig'slist "Free" page, I'll give it an exotic name like "SPECIALIZEDHotrock Coaster bike" or "Gladiator-style scooter" or "Unique British BMX" or"Made in USA 10 speed Rallye bike, 10mg Vpxl," whatever those idiotic terms mean. Here's anexample of my crappy merchandise (Note the exotic rust-colored chain & brakecables. These are truly one-of-a-kind.)

Best of all, my listings (and re-listings and re-re-re-re-listings) are ruiningthe marketplace you used to call craigslist.

By the way, I'm an idiot.


*Special Bonus: my personal favorite: (2/28/06)

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